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I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u", I love "u". Hey! Don't get excited, I love other alphabets too...v, w, x, y, z !
Last nite I lay in bed, looking at the stars, the beautiful sky and the endless horizon.... and suddenly I thought... where the hell is my roof?
Life without u is impossible. U r in my blood. Cannot stay for a sec without u. If there u aren't, I'm dead. Excuse me, I'm talking of oxygen
Sincere Apology : If u don't like any of my SMS n don't like 2 read, then plz don't hesitate, feel free to..... Throw ur mobile.
I have a confession to make, ever since I have known u, Its kinda hard for me to forget u. Every night u appear in my dreams.... And I find my self shouting..... BHOOT !!! BHOOT !!!
A good speech should b like a women's skirt... Long enough to cover the subject, And short enough to create interest.
There are 8 ways to describe you... nice, friendly, so cute, loving, very sweet, funny, charming , thoughtful. In short, you're just like.... me !
Why do U think I SMS u ? Is it because I care ? Or I miss u ? Or I love u ? Or I need You ? No ! It's b'coz... Timepass ke liye koi BAKRA chaiye !
Unlike others, ur brain is a masterpiece. it has 2 halves- the left & the right. The left has nothing right in it & d right has nothing left in it
Indian & Pakistani soldiers r on the border. But surprised they r not fighting ! Do u know why ? Coz dhishum dhishum to pepsodent ka kaam hai na ! ! !
Johny Walker : Mere pass bangla hai, gadi hai, bank loker hai, Kya hai tumhare pass ? Johny Leaver : Mere pass in sabki chabi hai !
Santa Singh Ji Zebra Crossing ke Black & White Patte par Bar Bar idhar se Udhar chalte the , Woh kya soch rahe honge ? THINK ???? "SALA YEH PIYANO BAJTA KYO NAHI ??"
Recent studies have revealed that idiots use their thumbs to scroll through their text messages. Don't change to your finger.... it's too late.... idiot !
Once god came up 2 me & granted me a wish. I asked 4 "world peace". That's impossible, he said. Then I asked him 2 give u brains. He said "Let me try world peace"
Friendship is like peeing in ur pants, everyone can see it but only you can feel it's warmth.
Zindagi mein tum bahut aage jaaoge, kyonki jahan bhi tum jaooge, sab kahenge, chal be chal aage chal.
Q.Why did Santa Singh take off his clothes while writing exams? A. Coz it was written in the paper "Answer in brief" !
The night is dark,the moon is high,i stop my car,u ask why? I come close 2 U, U feel shy, i tell u those 3 words..........Oh God ! Puncture !
Airhostes to Laloo : R U a vegetarian or non vegetarian Sir ? Laloo : I m a Saggitarian! Airhostes : Sir aap mansahari hain ya shakahari? Laloo : Hum BIHARI hain...!
God saw u hungry, he created Domino's pizza. He saw u thirsty, he created Pepsi. He saw u in dark, he created light. He saw ME without problems, he created YOU !
5 gr8 ppl: 1. Gandhiji-Woh to ab rahe nahin 2. Bajpai-Woh kisi kaam ke nahin 3. Aishwarya-apni pahoonch ke bahar hai. Baki rahe aap aur hum, so keep in touch.
Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes...... After that,..... Who cares ?..... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes !
Gandhi bhi chala gaya, nehru bhi mar gaya, subhash bose ka bhi kuchh pata nahi, aur meri bhi tabiyat thik nahi hai.... pata nahi desh ka ab kya hoga.
Let me guess what are you doing…? Reading a book?Na! Na! Na! Listening music ? OOOhhhuu! Watching TV? Nah….! Caught you missing me & reading my sms…na….! Oh now u r smiling…..!
I chased love i found friendship, i chased desires i found hopes, i chased reality i found dreams, i chased a monkey and i found you.
aabe o burai ke rasgulle, pap ki barfi, bewafai ke laddu, matlabi chuski, badmashi ke pedhe, jhoot ke kalakand ... Tu bada hi sweet hai re....
Shaktimaan Dusro Se Lad Raha Hai Batman Raat Mein Ghoom Raha hai, Spiderman Diwaron Par Chad Raha hai, Aur Dobberman SMS Padh raha hai
"when i call u,one ring means I m missing u, 2 ring means,i like u, 3 ring means i m thinking of u, 4 ring means i need u, 5 ring means.....ABE BEHRE!! PHONE UTHA.
Kya kar rahe ho? Busy ho? Kitne busy ho? Thode ho? ki bahut ho? Agar thoda ho to sms kyo nahi karte ho? aur agar zyada ho to, sms kyo padh rahe ho
u r as sweet as bailey as strong as tequila as warm as cognac as exotic as malibu as heady as a cocktail & as special as as a champagne. i am simply drunk on U.
Patthar se dosti, jaan ko khatra. Sardar se dosti, dimag ko khatra. Daru se dosti, Liver ko khatra. Hum se dosti, rat be rat SMS ka khatra.
Namaskaar! zinda ho to 1sms karo, aasmaan mechale gaye ho to baarish bhejo, Swarg me ho to APSRAA bhejo, aur agar NARAK me ho to... to....... to.. ENJOY THERE.
Aapko...hum sirf aapko aur aapko are aapko haan haan aapko ,baba aapko aapko only aapko aur kisi ko nahi bas aapko hamesha tang karenge......
Rose,Lotus,Tulips,Sunflower all flowers are nice and sweet but they have no comparison with U bcoz Gobhi ke phool ki to baat hi alag hoti hai.....
Jaise lohe ko loha kaatta hai,zehar ko zehar kaat ta hai, Heere ko keera kaat ta hai,Waise hi ek din tumko kutta katega....
If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round.... Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE? na Munna na its called high B/P...
Mujh mein aur George Bush mein kya similarity hai? Nahi pata? So simple Woh mere ghar nahi aata,Main uske ghar nahi jaata.Attitude problem u see...
Last night I dreamt that I was walking with GOD & I told him that I have a friend Like U ... he smiled & said,Beta! Yeh sab Pichle Janam Ke paap hain
Yaad hai wo pal jab hum pehli baar mile they... Train ruki khidki khuli... Nazron se nazrein mili aur aap ne kaha…. Allah ke naam pe kuch de de baba....
Maine tujhe dekha Dekhta raha, Dekhta hi gaya….. Phir mujhe chashma lag gaya
Gum woh cheez hai. Gum woh cheez hai. Jisse kagaz chipkaye jaate hai.
Beauty is not how you look, it is not how handsome u r, it is not ur figure too... Beauty is the inner self, so change ur underwear daily.
Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards? Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved' Gal: Great! I want 10 of them
Fill in the blank with yes or NO only. _______I M NOT A Male. Koi jaldi nahin hai, aaram se soch kar bata dena.
Paani mein Whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai. Paani mein Brandy milao to nasha chadta hai. Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.
Basanti: Bhaag Dhanno bhag, aaj teri Basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai. Dhanno: Tujhe apni padi hai. Meri soch jiske peeche Gabbar ke 10 ghode pade hain
Woman has man in it, Mrs has Mr in it, female has male in it, Madam has adam in it, so girls r always incomplete without boys.
Sharab Ek Bimari hai jo saare samaj ko khatam kar rahi hai. To aao milkar is bimari ko khatam karen. Ek bottle tum khatam karo ek bottle hum khatam karen.
Tum Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Haste Raho, Muskarate Raho, Sada Khilkhilate Raho, Khush Raho, Mera Kya hain Log Tumhe hi Paagal kahenge! Ha ha ha!
Q: What's the diff between mother & wife? A: One woman brings into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.
When I go wrong, I need ur hand 2 correct, wen emotions bust out, I need ur hand 2 catch, wen I win, I need ur hand 2 pat. In short:Ye Haath Mujhe De De Thakur
So Sweet is ur SMILE, So Sweet is ur STYLE, So Sweet is ur VOICE, So Sweet is ur EYE, see .......how Sweetly I Lie.
The Madrasi said: I want to see the movie 'Heart is umbrella'. Which movie did he really want to see? Dil Chhata Hai.......
Geeta Sar: SMS kar aur bhool ja, reply ki apeksha mat rakh, kiya hua SMS kabhi veyarth nahi jaata, Sabko apne kiye hue SMS ka reply milta hi hai!
Geeta Sar: SMS woh gyaan hai jo baantne se badta hai, isiliye he praani tu bill ka moh tyag de aur SMS kar, isi se tera manushaya janm safal hoga.
Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds...... Open ur eyes ! Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 seconds in thinking of a fool.
God made Pepsi, God made whisky, God made me so sexy, God made rivers, God made lakes and God made you... well everybody makes mistakes.
The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutter speed it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut!
Teacher: Four beautiful girls are walking on the road. Change it to exclamatory sentence. Student: WOW !
When u feel lonely and alone & cannot see any one around you, the world seems to be fading away, come along with me I'll take u to an eye specialist!
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Sometimes when u cry, no 1 sees ur tears. Sometimes when u r worried, no 1 sees ur pain. Sometimes when u r happy, no 1 sees ur smile. But fart just once...
Think big, think smart, think positive, think beautiful, think great, I know this is too much for you, so here is a shortcut... just think about ME!
Today, tommorow and yesterday there'll be one heart that would always beat for you. You know Whose? Your Own Stupid!
When u smile the world smiles with u. Wen u r down people'll rally behind u but when u fart u r alone coz people'll never stand by u!
Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito to her mother. Yes, but be aware, pay attention during the applause.
Q: Why do men fart more often than women? A: Because women do not keep their mouth shut long enough to build up the pressure.
Tussi brilliant, beautiful, genius, smart, nice, gud looking, intelligent, respectful, kind, ideal sohne sunakhe gabru jawaan da sms par rahe ho.
My goal is to be a failure! If I reach my goal, I'll be successful and if I don't reach my goal, I'll still be successful.
Jab tum hanstey ho to lagta hai ki insaan pehle bandar tha! Dekho gussa mat karo kyonki jab tum gussa karte ho to lagta hai ki insaan aaj bhi bandar hai.
Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain and that's where you get your shitty ideas from!
Yamraj ne ek ladke ki jaan le li. Chitragupt- Iss ko waqt se pehle kyon mara? Yumraj: Kya karun, March end mein target jo pura karna tha.
Sharabi eyes donate karne gaya, Counter Clerk asks: Kuch kehna chahte ho? Sharabi: Jise lagao usse bata dena ye do peg ke baad khulti hain.
Osama to Big B: How are you?? Big B: Bas Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham. And you? Osama: Bas Kabhi Gola Kabhi Bum.
Look at the ocean & see God's abundance! Look at the sky & see God's glory! Look at the moon & see God's wonder! Look at the mirror & see God's Blunder!
Q: What do you call a fat lady waiting for a bus? A: A Moti-vaiting.
Y does Waheeda Rehman never changes her saree in the film GUIDE? Coz Dev Anand says: O mere humrahi, meri baanh thame chalna, badle duniya SARI, tum na badalna.
Be careful when a guy tells u that he loves u from the bottom of his heart for this may mean that there is still enough space for another girl on top.
Like energy, love can neither be created nor destroyed. It can just be transferred from one girlfriend to another girlfriend.
When u r down & no one is there, don't think of me. When u r crying & no one is there then too don't just think of me, call me up, my incoming is free.
Look at the world around u; u’ll see God's creativity. Look at the breakfast table; u’ll c God's providence. Look at the mirror u’ll c God's sense of humor.
A student writes a letter via telegram to his dad. It goes... No fun, send mon, your son! Dad write back saying...so sad, too bad, your dad!
You should do two things in the morning...Pray to God so you can live and have a shower so others can live.
Q: If a devil catches your wife, what would you do? A: You can do nothing. if devil has committed a mistake let him face the consequences.
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't be everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
The rain makes all
things beautiful. The grass & flowers too. If rain makes all things
beautiful why doesn't it rain on you? |